catch-all: [zia, gritting her teeth] ace d. portgas

[squelching]

imagine having a shitpost

Comments

[selfimmolation]

[ ?????????? ]

Why did you ask?

[squelching]

[she giggles, which is maybe a wee bit ominous.]

No reason! I was just wondering if something I read was true.

[selfimmolation]

Something you.... read?

[ he is putting numbers together ]

Was I in the newspaper. Saya.

[squelching]

[her lip wobbles precariously for a second

and then she bursts into laughter without saying anything, like an asshole. but she at least shoves the newspaper at him so he can see for himself.]

[selfimmolation]

[ unfuuuurls it...... ]




Why.

[squelching]

Ahaha, you should get your heart checked. It sounds serious.

[selfimmolation]

It sounds like I've got a disease.

[squelching]

It's a disease called love.

[now she's just bullying.]

[selfimmolation]

[ she is, but unfortunately it makes him laugh ]

Love's a disease, now?

[squelching]

Of course, Mister Burning Heart.

[selfimmolation]

I've been called passionate, but no one's ever accused me of something like this before. [ he's over it he thinks it's silly ] They really picked names at random, huh.

[squelching]

Probably. Are you and Vane even close?

[selfimmolation]

I've never even talked to the guy one on one?

[ this changes later but ]

[squelching]

Ah... They really did pick the names at random.

[looks at trial. help.]

[selfimmolation]

Well, it's not the worst slander I've gotten, I guess.

[squelching]

Mhmm, they could've easily fit a few more puns in there.

[THE LIMPID POOLS OF HIS EYES...]

[selfimmolation]

No, there were enough puns.

[squelching]

[in a terrible imitation of ace's voice:]

His body is a booty I want to plunder. Arrrgh.

[selfimmolation]

[

ok she deserves this he is grabbing her and giving her a noogie ]

[squelching]

[she knows she deserves this, which is why she starts laughing like an awful gremlin.]

Ace—!

[selfimmolation]

You think it's sooo funny, huh?

[ he says, laughing equally hard as he bullies her ]

[squelching]

[INEFFECTIVELY SLAPPING HIS HANDS.]

Come on, you have to admit it's at least a little funny!

[selfimmolation]

Oh, so I should write your torrid love story in the paper?

[squelching]

Sure. [she triple dog dares you...] What would you write?

[selfimmolation]

[ blinks ]

...

Wait, it's weird if I do it for you.