[saya actually gets to walk back to snorm with him i think. he will hold her hand if she wants to hold hands. he is a little dazed still, but the furious anger is gradually ebbing and giving way to something cold and sick. he might puke. his hands are a mess, knuckles busted the way they are when you hit someone in the face again and again even though they can't fight back and deeply consider how long five minutes are, how easy it would be to keep going.]
[she will hold his hand on their way there, especially because she's extremely worried about that look on his face. if he allows her to guide him, she will take them up the elevator when they get to snorm, and lead him to the couches on the third floor. sit, please.]
... I thought about killing him this week. As a precaution. And... then I had Whisper's power, and I didn't. [one murder proposal, never submitted.] I'm sorry, Reigen.
[yeah, she will. but what she says actually shakes him out of it a bit.]
Saya. [it's not a surprise that she'd kill, but he is a little startled that she would have killed somebody like that, who he hadn't even clocked as a threat exactly. clearly grieving, but outwardly claiming he had no intention to follow through.] I'm glad you didn't.
... Yeah. I don't know if I would have gotten to him on time, anyway.
[maybe she would have killed him before he could get to whisper. or maybe she would have been too late. and then whisper would be dead, and saya would be on trial. doesn't stop her from wishing she killed him, though.
also, she's going to pull out a remedy and hold it out to him. your knuckles, sir.]
It's not your fault this happened. You know that, don't you?
[god. she looks so, so relieved to hear that. but it doesn't stop her from frowning and trying to shove the remedy into his hands again. please. use it.]
Good. I was... worried. That you didn't know that. He's stupid and acted without knowing all the facts. It's all him.
I dunno about that. I do things I know aren't right, and then it leads to something even worse... eventually, don't I need to acknowledge my complicity?
Yes. [that's the thing about it. he will look up to meet her eye, firm.] This isn't something I've made up in my head to feel sad about. Even if the consequences aren't something I could have intended or foreseen, doing careless things is eventually going to hurt someone you didn't intend.
Just saying "this probably won't hurt anyone," or "the only people it will hurt don't matter to me" - it doesn't work. You can't live a selfish life and then disclaim responsibility for the unintended effects of it. I didn't have to taunt Yae Miko. I didn't have to lose my cool when she made me film that video. I didn't have to curse anyone. I didn't have to lie to everyone about what happened and try to get away with it on my own, and I didn't have to keep lying about what happened afterwards. But I chose to do those things. Yae Miko and Adlet are responsible for choosing to try and kill someone, but I still have to acknowledge that there were consequences to my actions. And I owed Whisper more than to be so careless about that.
It would be easier for you if you didn't care so much, you know?
[quietly, like she thinks it's the saddest thing she's ever heard. even now, after he's basically explained it to her, it's difficult for her to wrap her head around why it bothers him so much. but... she's trying, because she at least understands this is important to him for some reason. and she sighs and sits on the couch next to him, drawing her legs up to her chest and resting her chin on her knees.]
You told me you wanted to change. What are you going to do, Reigen?
If I didn't care so much, I wouldn't have anything to care about.
[that was the whole problem in the first place. he was so bored, and so miserable, because he was so totally alone in the world and nothing mattered to him.]
Dunno. Try. Keep trying. That's all I can do, right?
[he'll allow it, putting an arm around her shoulders. tired.]
The absolute last thing I want to do is let that bastard kill me. [if he wanted that, he should have done it on thursday and left whisper alone. it's too late now.] Honestly... I'm sure he's much better in a fight than I am, but he's stupid. I think I'll be okay.
[there is the fact that he has saya's power right now, though.]
I don't have any more charges on stopping time, but I have other tricks.
[she doesn't have to specify what "it" is. thinking about seeing it on display in public makes her feel queasy, but she'd prefer that to reigen avoiding it and dying.]
Nimona said you couldn't control your body very well. But there isn't a lot that can kill you in that form, even if you can't move.
How do you control it, exactly? I wasn't that good at it, but I also wasn't expecting it. [he rubs his jaw.] I think... if I knew what I was doing with it, I might be able to use it without making it too obvious.
Hmm... That's a little difficult to answer because I've had that body since I was born. But you have to learn how to flex the right muscles, like I did with this body. And... like you did when you were first learning to walk?
[she stretches her arm, as if to demonstrate, flexing her hand. she is a slime adjacent monster, but she's not pure slime. more like a sack of reticulated flesh and muscle.]
You don't have to change all at once. It'll probably be easier for you to get used to it if you did a limb at a time.
[he will concentrate and turn one arm into a sort of fleshy slimey tentacle. for just a second, before it starts to drip. understand i know your power isn't just slime, i just figured he'd be bad at using it.]
...I could always do this to whatever body part he managed to injure. If I'm wearing a suit, it's not going to be that noticeable. Maybe it's actually just something I can always do, because it turns out I'm the strongest man in the world, and I just believe in myself this much.
[oh yes, i just meant it as flavor text. she watches his arm with a strange sort of fascination, like she's never seen it from an outsider's point of view before, until his arm starts dripping and she immediately grabs a newspaper to place under his arm. that shit can stain.]
... Was that a joke? [tiredly, but she laughs a little.] If you do it right before the hit lands, it shouldn't transfer to your human body, since your wound would seal instantly. I... think. I haven't run many experiments since I arrived here.
[and now she is thinking of running one in the name of science.]
[he's actually fine with that. let's practice. we both know this doesn't happen but it's funny.]
And - it's a joke, sure. [no, literally. saya may want to rip out this guy's tongue but reigen would just prefer to emotionally destroy him by mocking his own delusions as he kills him. he absolutely would have claimed it was just something he could do as the strongest man in the world.] But I bet it would really piss him off, huh?
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week 3; saturday
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... I thought about killing him this week. As a precaution. And... then I had Whisper's power, and I didn't. [one murder proposal, never submitted.] I'm sorry, Reigen.
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Saya. [it's not a surprise that she'd kill, but he is a little startled that she would have killed somebody like that, who he hadn't even clocked as a threat exactly. clearly grieving, but outwardly claiming he had no intention to follow through.] I'm glad you didn't.
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[maybe she would have killed him before he could get to whisper. or maybe she would have been too late. and then whisper would be dead, and saya would be on trial. doesn't stop her from wishing she killed him, though.
also, she's going to pull out a remedy and hold it out to him. your knuckles, sir.]
It's not your fault this happened. You know that, don't you?
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Man. I know. I didn't make him hurt Whisper. I didn't even vote for his boyfriend. He could have come after me any time and found that out.
[still though. still.]
I have something of a pattern with these things.
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Good. I was... worried. That you didn't know that. He's stupid and acted without knowing all the facts. It's all him.
[a tilt of her head.]
... What do you mean?
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[don't be relieved. he understands that, but it doesn't mean he understands.]
I just keep getting people hurt who really don't deserve it. This guy, he's an idiot. But if it happens over and over again...
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... Why are you so stubborn?
[god. fine. she keeps the remedy, but she doesn't look at all happy about it.]
But that's not on you. You don't control what happens to other people, Reigen.
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Just saying "this probably won't hurt anyone," or "the only people it will hurt don't matter to me" - it doesn't work. You can't live a selfish life and then disclaim responsibility for the unintended effects of it. I didn't have to taunt Yae Miko. I didn't have to lose my cool when she made me film that video. I didn't have to curse anyone. I didn't have to lie to everyone about what happened and try to get away with it on my own, and I didn't have to keep lying about what happened afterwards. But I chose to do those things. Yae Miko and Adlet are responsible for choosing to try and kill someone, but I still have to acknowledge that there were consequences to my actions. And I owed Whisper more than to be so careless about that.
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It would be easier for you if you didn't care so much, you know?
[quietly, like she thinks it's the saddest thing she's ever heard. even now, after he's basically explained it to her, it's difficult for her to wrap her head around why it bothers him so much. but... she's trying, because she at least understands this is important to him for some reason. and she sighs and sits on the couch next to him, drawing her legs up to her chest and resting her chin on her knees.]
You told me you wanted to change. What are you going to do, Reigen?
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[he will sit as well, deflating a bit.]
If I didn't care so much, I wouldn't have anything to care about.
[that was the whole problem in the first place. he was so bored, and so miserable, because he was so totally alone in the world and nothing mattered to him.]
Dunno. Try. Keep trying. That's all I can do, right?
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But you have to stay alive to keep trying, okay?
[she will lean on him if he allows it, just. feeling a little extra clingy after the whole mess of these past two weekends.]
It might be you in the arena with him tomorrow. Are you... prepared for that?
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The absolute last thing I want to do is let that bastard kill me. [if he wanted that, he should have done it on thursday and left whisper alone. it's too late now.] Honestly... I'm sure he's much better in a fight than I am, but he's stupid. I think I'll be okay.
[there is the fact that he has saya's power right now, though.]
I don't have any more charges on stopping time, but I have other tricks.
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[she doesn't have to specify what "it" is. thinking about seeing it on display in public makes her feel queasy, but she'd prefer that to reigen avoiding it and dying.]
Nimona said you couldn't control your body very well. But there isn't a lot that can kill you in that form, even if you can't move.
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[she and nimona talked about that, huh?]
How do you control it, exactly? I wasn't that good at it, but I also wasn't expecting it. [he rubs his jaw.] I think... if I knew what I was doing with it, I might be able to use it without making it too obvious.
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[she stretches her arm, as if to demonstrate, flexing her hand. she is a slime adjacent monster, but she's not pure slime. more like a sack of reticulated flesh and muscle.]
You don't have to change all at once. It'll probably be easier for you to get used to it if you did a limb at a time.
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...I could always do this to whatever body part he managed to injure. If I'm wearing a suit, it's not going to be that noticeable. Maybe it's actually just something I can always do, because it turns out I'm the strongest man in the world, and I just believe in myself this much.
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... Was that a joke? [tiredly, but she laughs a little.] If you do it right before the hit lands, it shouldn't transfer to your human body, since your wound would seal instantly. I... think. I haven't run many experiments since I arrived here.
[and now she is thinking of running one in the name of science.]
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[he's actually fine with that. let's practice. we both know this doesn't happen but it's funny.]
And - it's a joke, sure. [no, literally. saya may want to rip out this guy's tongue but reigen would just prefer to emotionally destroy him by mocking his own delusions as he kills him. he absolutely would have claimed it was just something he could do as the strongest man in the world.] But I bet it would really piss him off, huh?
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[this doesn't happen but it's so funny. truly unhinged snake dorm hours. help.
she is seriously considering this, though...]
... Are you sure? It probably won't hurt you, but you can still feel pain.
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[his vibe is like. he will whine for hours if he burns his tongue but also would get hit by a truck and just walk away.]
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... Okay.
[she gets up to make her way to the side of the room where the kitchen is
and then she unceremoniously throws a glass jar at him.]